“Life, like time, is finite. Busy and distracted by everyday demands, we take this for granted. My question to you is what legacy are you leaving behind?”
How often do you find yourself spending more than 14 hours a day working? And how many times has this slipped into a Saturday or Sunday too? Do you get so caught up in the rush, that late at night you start to lose your sense of time and orientation, your day a blur of moving from meeting to meeting, place to place. It is a privilege to love your job, to be passionate about your profession. It has increasingly become a mark of success to hold your job/business as your pride and joy, even a marker of self-worth. But you need to ask yourself some serious questions:
● Does your work and business take over from other aspects in your life?
● Do you often feel tired and working too hard?
● Do you feel that there is not enough time in the day to have fulfilling relationships?
Maybe from an outsider’s perspective, you are highly successful, generally happy in life and business. You live a luxurious, above average lifestyle beyond what the man on the street could imagine, but deep in your heart do you feel that something is missing? Is there a niggling sense of sorrow or loneliness? Does the seemingly successful career and business perhaps not reflect a fulfilled life, rich across the holistic facets of contentment? It is now accepted truth that money and success are far from the only indicators for happiness. You may have chosen to live a single life, consciously or unconsciously by the decisions you have made. But at the end of the day people are social beings in their very nature, and innately seek a partner, who can inspire the best version of you.
So what is stopping you from taking the leap? Perhaps you feel like you haven’t met the right person or you simply don’t have enough time. There is never the perfect person or perfect moment for a relationship. Sometimes you are required to stop for a moment and evaluate your quality of life.
● How happy are you before you go to sleep at night?
● When you have a big success, who do you share it with?
● If you are struggling with a challenge, who supports you in the difficult moments?
If your response is that you are capable of looking after yourself, you are missing the point. Happiness multiplies by sharing it with someone, and difficulties are halved. Sometimes, all that is needed is to actively make a conscious decision to be open to possibility. Commit to yourself that you want to live your best life, your most successful life, across all spheres – work, home, family, friends. We always think that there will be more time, but this one of the great misconceptions of life. None of us know, exactly how much time we have left.
Time is the one commodity that we can’t get enough of, and that money cannot buy. Research studies have shown that balancing your free time is one of the key ways to find true happiness. According to the book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing, these are the most common regrets people have :
– I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself and not the life others expected of me.
– I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
– I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
– I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
– I wish that I had let myself be happier.
No one said, I wish I made more money or I wish I had a more successful business. Money and success is not an asset we can take to the other side.
There are a finite number of hours in each day. Let’s say average life expectancy for a human being is 80 (more or less). You are now in the prime age, between 28-55 years old, where you have achieved a certain level of success in your life. But are you still single/ separated or living an unfulfilled life? If you are, what would you do differently now? What would it take for you make a conscious decision to create a vision to share your life with an exceptional person? Visualise what your life would look like with a partner to expand your experience to even greater heights. What is missing for you to say, I am proud of my legacy, I lived my fullest life and relished all it had to offer.
Would you ask yourself the following questions:
● Does being content mean I’ve relinquished my desire to meet an amazing partner in life?
● Am I genuinely happy by myself? Is this what I want for the rest of my life?
● What do I actually need and want in a relationship?
● How do I balance my relationships, work and other areas of my life to live a truly enriched, fulfilled life?
The first step is to assess your relationships blueprint. Take an accurate assessment of what is of real value, and measure what have you invested for yourself in your one, precious life.
Start with STEP 1: THE WHY
There are some fundamental reasons to assess your blueprint. Evaluating where you are now gives you insight into where you should be allocating your ultimate asset – time.
● Recognise where your time and effort is best and, conversely, poorly spent.
● Recognise indicators of progress and regression on your life goals.
● Recognise your strengths and your weaknesses.
● Reflect, ruminate, internalise and retain life-lessons learned.
Playwright Sarah Jones asks a profound question – what if joy was the only metric for success? Consider that again – what if joy was the only metric for success? Would you be successful then?
“By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.” – Confucius
Reflection raises our awareness and gives us an insight to challenge predictable cycles of behaviours and beliefs. It helps us make critical adjustments about what is not working while moving on with relish onto that which is working.
We get one life and every passing moment that goes by, we will never get back again. This present moment is so precious we have to be here, be in it. Imagine yourself 10-20 more years from now, how would you measure the success of your life lived?
In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we are afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make. A relationship has no pause button, it won’t wait for you while you decide whether or not you have time for it. People change and move on. It is a matter of choice, to act now, or not, both are choices.
If this article has brought greater awareness to your desire right now for a relationship, it’s time to accept that you have to allocate space and time differently. If you want BOTH a career and a great relationship with yourself and others, you can create that life.
To take a step forward to identify how to assess your relationships blueprint and to build better relationships in life and business – Get access to Relationships Blueprint.
2. Last words spoken by Steve Jobs before he died: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TeZtII7maM